IUI Beta, 12 DPO: Holy Fuck

Wow. Thank you for the outpouring of love and congrats yesterday. It feels like this is happening to someone else. I had to keep checking the HPT to make sure I wasn’t imagining things. Doublechecked five times that it says HCG and not LH (lol). I was half convinced it was a fluke and the next HPT would be dead white again. But nope:


That is definitely definitely positive. Not even a squinter.

I’m still hesitant to even think it’s possible. I kind of want to hold out really believing it until that line keeps getting darker for a few days. So worried about it being a chemical, but even if it is – holy fuck. I’ve never seen two lines before. I can implant! Yes! Now I just need that sucker to grow. If all goes well, I’ll be calling the RE on Monday and we’ll get a beta test sometime this week.

So, so hard not to think about all the worst case scenarios. I’m just trying to breathe and accept and take each day that I have a positive test as a gift. Thankfully, I have a massage today.

I’ll update with more stuff about symptoms (or the lack thereof) if it’s still darker tomorrow.

In the meantime, here’s my strangely fortuitously timed haircut:




Filed under gaybies, PCOS, TTC, two week wait

18 responses to “IUI Beta, 12 DPO: Holy Fuck

  1. Holy fuck is right! I’m so excited for you both! As a fellow repeat single pink line’r, I totally understand your apprehension in getting excited about this too soon. You may be pinching yourself right through to when you hold that baby in your arms. We’ll be here, with our pompoms, pumping up the optimism on your behalf. Does your doctor do betas for IUI pregnancies?

    • I might just, that’s for sure! Hopefully it becomes more real when it gets physically obvious. 🙂
      Yes, they do if you have a positive HPT. So I’ll be calling Monday morning to let them know and get that scheduled.

  2. For what it’s worth, none of my chemical pregnancies showed up on an HPT until at least 13dpo, and even then the lines were fainter than yours.

    Your hair looks awesome!

  3. I’m so excited for you! I understand the hesitation – but I have a good feeling! I love the haircut, too!

  4. This makes me teary with happiness. I am just so so happy for you! Your hair looks great!

  5. Fat Girl Dancing

    I love your hair 🙂

  6. Your hair looks as beautiful as that HPT!!!!!!!!!

  7. AndiePants

    Your hair is fabulous and the line is too!

  8. That line is so much darker than the previous day’s test!
    I tested a bunch and worried a lot in the beginning of my pregnancy too, it’s normal, but here’s something someone told me that helped so I’ll pass it along…
    Pregnancy problems are grossly over represented in online communities, once it’s in it’s in! There’s no reason to expect anything other than a normal pregnancy and birth.
    Especially with you, you’re like, super fit and healthy.

    • Thank you! That’s helpful – and true. I forget that people will blog about the worst things instead of the normal things, so it definitely skews towards looking hopeless. Kind of like when you google some innocuous symptom and everything tells you it’s cancer, when in reality it’s probably a cold.

  9. jen.g

    Amazing! Miracles happen! Your hair looks awesome!

  10. This is amazing news!! Sending you lots of sticky vibes!!!

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