TTC Round 2, #2 | DPO 11

Does anyone have experience with PMDD? I don’t know if I have it, but I have experienced every single one of those symptoms – short of panic attacks – for each of the past five/six cycles. It could just be complicated by the TTC process, but I feel absolutely out of control of my emotions, whereas normally I can at least talk some sense into myself. It’s like I’ve been forced out of the emotion process and have to stand outside and watch through the window as everything goes tits up. This isn’t even remotely rational. It hasn’t been for a while.

All that is to say I think I’m finally ready to go see a therapist. When I’m more depressed and for longer than my wife, who is clinically depressed, then maybe I need to admit there’s an actual problem. Well, not admit. That’s not the right word. Realize.

Ugh. Just. The whole finding a therapist process. Calling them. Hoping they aren’t an asshole. Finding one that actually works. Plus figuring out how to get there and back from work, how to get enough time to go from work, and all the prerequisite logistics… there are so many hoops and hurdles to jump through it’s ridiculous. Especially because work went from being super lax to super strict about time (fuckers).

But this isn’t really about me anymore. My wife deserves better than this.


Day 1 – Ten random facts about yourself
Day 2 – Nine things you do every day
Day 3 – Eight things that annoy you
Day 4 – Seven fears/phobias
Day 5 – Six songs that you’re addicted to
Day 6 – Five things you can’t live without
Day 7 – Four memories you won’t forget
Day 8 – Three words you can’t go a day without
Day 9 – Two things you wish you could do
Day 10 – One person you can trust


Day 8: Three Words I Can’t Operate Without

I’m going to leave aside the obvious to be, pronouns, and articles because those are boring.


1) Goodness.

2) Love

3) Fuck



1 Comment

Filed under depression, gaybies, TTC, two week wait

One response to “TTC Round 2, #2 | DPO 11

  1. I think part of the feeling out of control around your period may be related to the TTC process, I mean we are out of control of if we conceive or not…
    I hope you get it figured out. My wife may have that, she often has an angry cry before her period. The week the mirena IUD lasted in her was wonderful.

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