I didn’t actually think I’d be making another TTC post this soon. The way my cycles were going the past few months (see: not at all) i thought it wouldn’t be until February that we had an opportunity.
But ferning was happening & other signs were in place & we had only one day to try before we went out of town for the funeral. After not ovulating the previous two cycles & having two veerrry long cycles before that I didn’t have much hope for anything to work anytime soon. So I figured I would think of this as a test run to get back into the groove. We would insem & I wouldn’t take a thermometer with us so I couldn’t obsess about timing & it would all be no big deal. Because what were the chances that we actually got the timing right?
It kinda worked. I only thought about the possibility of it working or not a handful (see: dozen) times. I was only mildly anxious to get back home & temp. I was only mildly anxious while I waited for the thermometer to beep on Friday morning.
I was surprised to see my temp all the way up at 97.9. That was higher than it had been in months – but not quite ov-heights. Granted, it was much later in the morning than I normally temp. Then on Saturday it was comfortably at 98.1 & I was confident I had actually ovulated.
But when? I have no idea. That’s the problem with not temping earlier. But I’m okay with that decision. I’m going to try not to think about it which might actually be easier if I don’t know exactly when my TTW should end. Could be just a week! Could be a week and a half! Who knows!
I’m not symptom spotting at all, which is good, since symptoms don’t mean anything until after those two weeks. I also mostly feel chill and have to kinda force myself to remember we even tried this time.
So I’ll be okay if this one doesn’t work, because I’m just happy to have somewhat of a normal cycle again and happy that I ovulated at all. It means maybe I’m not fucked up and maybe all the weird in the fall was just diet and stress. If that’s true, then I have agency again. Thank god.