I finally made an appt to go see the doctor. I hope it was the right decision. After last cycle’s weird non-period and now seven straight days of heavy spotting, I’m at a loss. But the appt isn’t for another two weeks because I am a smart cookie and didn’t bother getting hooked up with a gyno prior to this process.
If I die in the meantime, hopefully you all learn from my mistake.
Just kidding – it’s not that bad. I’m just being depressed and melodramatic. The last thing I want to do is go to the doctor, because inevitably they will find nothing, laugh at me, and then charge me a lot. Or they find something, do nothing, and still charge me a lot. I hate that I so frequently decide whether or not to go to the doctor (usually not) based on financial reasons, but that’s health insurance for you. Or at least crappy health insurance. Thankfully they cover almost everything once you’re actually pregnant. But non-pregnant and sick? Yeah, you’re screwed.
It’s not that we don’t have money socked away for this, it’s just that I don’t want to use it up frivolously pre-baby. And yeah, I’m still smarting from the time and money spent last year to find out that the inexplicable skin rash was inflammation. No, really?
I don’t know why I’m counting DPO anymore. Some small part of me still hopes that it could take despite things being so messed up. Really I just need to calm down, step away, and come back in a month. Maybe two.
Having family here the next few days should be a welcome distraction.