I have been so tired these last few days. Somehow I managed to sleep eleven hours straight Wednesday night, but I was still exhausted all of Thursday. Today is only a little better – at least I can get some work done while at work, instead of propping my head up and pretending I’m not asleep at my desk. Still fatigued, enough that it’s barely registered that we’ve not only reached the halfway point of April, but full on surpassed it. We are sailing through towards May.
With both the wedding and our first 2WW in April, I didn’t set too many goals because I knew we’d be distracted. What I did set, I thought was reasonable at the time. Keep lifting. Keep on with the PLP(H) program. Eat clean. Get plenty of rest. And finish those damn edits by mid-April.
I kept up with most of those, save for the physical goals during this past week due to the fatigue. But wow, have I fallen short of the mark for my edits. It is now three days past mid-April and I have at least 30+ pages left to edit. My hard deadline was May 1st, because I wanted to get the edits out to my betas asap after that. At the beginning of April, I had thought if I could forge ahead and finish two weeks earlier, then I’d have that extra time to finagle any last pieces wot needed finagling. Which is always the case, because what draft is ever perfect?
Alas, I didn’t edit or write at all while we were out of town and between that and the fatigue, my production and goals have been thoroughly walloped. Now I only have twelve days until my hard deadline. Twelve days and 30+ pages isn’t impossible. It shouldn’t even be that hard. But it’ll require ducking my head, blocking out the rest of the world, and focusing every chance I get.
Which means this weekend, between running a 5k, hiking up Tumamoc, baking hot cross buns, and assembling our food for the week, I have to carve out time to write. It’s funny how I’ve learned to make time for our weekly cook-ups, for thrice weekly lifting sessions, for runs, and for obsessing over TTC, but I still have trouble doing the same thing for writing, which is easily more important to me than all of the above. Why do you think that is?
It’s weirdly difficult to prioritize writing. I need to figure out why, because once I do I feel like I’ll have a better handle on my productivity.
In the meantime, I have some real motivation to finish these edits by May 1st. Not just to satisfy my betas, but also to just be done already. This story has been in my mind and my life off and on for well over a year now and I am itching to move on. I have other things to write, one of which just slammed into me with the force of a semi truck just this morning.
The lure of a new story is strong – everything is so shiny and fresh, and I get to build and listen to a whole new playlist. But first, I must finish this one. It’s like eating your liver before you can have cake, right?